so the commission charged with investigating the tiger escape incident at the SF Zoo a few months ago recently released its official report. It’s a pretty gripping read, and it’s written in very formal, objective language that makes for some wholly unintentional hilarity-though-understatement. Example:
“Zookeeper (Anthony Brown), the shooting team member on site, is leaving the zoo for the day and over hears the 911 “first aid” call on the zoo radio. He asks Alan if he should stay and is told no, so he departs to check out.”
“From the fire hydrant near rhino, Howe sees a tiger from her golf cart outside of the exhibit at Nyala Picnic Area path intersection near the Lion House grottos. She calls over the radio “Code 1 Tiger”. Zookeeper (Anthony Brown) reconsiders decision to leave for the day…”
Yeah, you know, I think I would reconsider too. The full report is available here.
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