Category Archives: schooling

help desk folly

apparently Sheryl Crow is now a technician for ITS, or so I was told by a client who was apparently assisted by her.

we also reset passwords for Myspace user accounts, and conduct the majority of our academic and administrative business with glittery animated GIFs (“GRADEZ N EVALS”) and bulletins (“YO YO YO GEORGE B HERE, WE GONNA ROCK THOSE TREESITTERS RIGHT OUTTA DA TREES”).  yo yo yo, myspace ≠ my.ucsc, aiight?

late edition update: got an email from a UCSC graduate who needed our help “accessing his porthole.”  He forgot his “porthole account information.” Arr, matey, you’ll be walkin’ the plank before you get my gold transcripts and jewel-crusted GPA.


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so there I am…

at work, browsing craigslist, something awful, nytimes, you know, working.  It’s 2:00, and I’m glad that I have an hour left before I can go home… and browse craigslist, something awful, nytimes—you know, relaxing.

then it begins

a flood

a torrent

of calls from students

apparently writing 2 classes opened for enrollment at 2:00 and faced with hundreds of students trying to enroll in them, my.ucsc decided to do the prudent thing

and shut down completely

we probably got like 40 calls in a matter of 5 or 10 minutes, which subsided only when I put up a message on the phones:


or something like that.

but the best part came at about 2:30 when a older lady—the mother of a freshman, she told me—called in, quite flustered:

“uh, yes, uh, you see, I’m calling long-distance from my office, and you see, we’re just having a terrible time here, I’m trying to enroll my son in a writing class, you see we’ve been trying for the last 40 minutes and it keeps saying we’re not authorized and-”

“okay, yeah, we’re aware that my.ucsc has been having issues, it had to be manually restarted due to the large number of students attempting to enroll, blah blah blah”

I get her to clear her cache, cookies, etc, and during this she lets this little gem go:

“Now, I have a question for you:  you see, I went to an ivy league school, and, well, we never had this kind of issue.  Would you say that this kind of thing, is, uh, the difference between, you know, an ivy league-quality school, and, well, your school?”

“…I really don’t think that’s an appropriate conclusion to draw from this, ma’am.” (yes, I said ma’am)

“…oh.  I see.”

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New Jersey Sons

So I procrastinated on writing a “critical analysis” paper of a feature New Yorker article. And by procrastinated, I mean I started about an hour ago, and it’s due tomorrow. But it’s okay, I think it turned out well. I was stumped, until I got inspired, and ended up comparing the subject of the article to Tony Soprano. I think any paper that uses the quote, “I don’t need a gynecologist to know which way the wind blows” is a guaranteed “A.”

Our Man In Pyongyang 


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exciting schedule-related activities

so I signed up for next quarter’s classes today, I think it turned out pretty well…


Ubiquitous/Mobile Technology (10:00-11:45)
Practice (2:00-5:00)
Personal Computers (4:00-5:45)
America & Americans (6:00-7:45)
Fish Rap Live! (Tuesdays only, 8:00)

Now you may be wondering how I can be both at ultimate practice AND personal computers.  The answer is quite simple: to get an “A” in personal computers you have to show up at class exactly three times—first day, midterm, and final.  I’m just taking it for the GE, to be honest/conceited I could probably teach that class.  I might sign up for another class on MWF just so I won’t feel like a total cop-out.

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